Forgiveness Is For You

 Forgiveness is for You

By Carolyn McCardell

Back in summer of 2007 near the beginning of the new school year my husband and I went to enroll our children in school.  Realizing that we forgot something at home we made a quick stop back at the house. Upon returning home we soon discovered that it had been broken into. My husband went in the living room looking for the laptop and couldn't find it anywhere. Not thinking that anything was wrong I insisted it had to be in there, he assured me that he couldn't find it . I went into the bedroom and noticed that our t.v. displayed a blue screen and at the same time we realized that the XBOX 360 game system was gone and that we had been the victims of a burglary. This has never happened to us before. I was completely at a loss for words.  My husband called the police who came and made an incident  report.  We let the officer leave before noticing that my husband's mac computer was also gone. By this time my husband was steaming mad.  Trying to be detectives, we looked around the house for any clues.  I remembered on the way home seeing our neighbors son crossing the street near our driveway just as we were turning onto our street. This struck me as being suspicious even before we found out about our home being burglarized.  Having a hunch, I went to the neighbors house and told them about the burglary and asked if they saw anything suspicious. The two young men said that they hadn't seen anything. My suspicions about them remained, but at the time I had no proof that they were the ones who broke into my home. I made a note to call the police and tell them of my suspicions; of course they did absolutely nothing about it.  Each day my suspicions grew stronger, so did my anger. I became so consumed with my anger and suspicion that each day I went outside to the end of our driveway and stared my neighbors son's down.  They eventually became so uneasy about my endless staring that they stopped coming outside (at least in the daylight).  My husband told me that I needed to stop letting the incident consume me but I was so angry that it became a part of my daily routine to stare the neighbors son's down.  Some days I felt like calling one of my acquaintances from the 'hood' to run into the neighbors house and get our stuff back.  I was so overwhelmed by my feelings that I had to pray because it was becoming too much for me to handle.

God began to work on my heart about the young men that I suspected had committed the crime. When the police started to investigate and it turned out that the main culprit was one of the young men. My initial feeling was that I didn't necessarily want him to go to jail because I knew that most of the time incarceration can make the person come out worse than they were before they entered.  After the officer informed that it wasn't the first time that the young man had been charged with breaking and entering, I started to become angry again.  On top of that, the young guy refused to give the location of the items that he stole.  A couple of months had passed when the police finally arrested him for breaking into my house.  I was still angry but my heart became heavy for the young man because he had to serve 7 months in Jail for what he had done. Being a mother of four boys myself, I really didn't want the guy to go to jail, but it was out of my hands.  I knew that the young man had a drug problem so I hoped that the jail time would help him to focus and try to be a more productive person in society.  When the young man finally got out of jail, God was already pushing me to another level, a level that I hadn't even been before.  I saw the young man crossing the street, so I called him over. I didn't know how he would react, but he came right over. The first thing I told him was that I forgive him. His response was that he was sorry. He said that he wasn't thinking right, that he was so high then that he couldn't see straight. At that moment, the anger and bad feelings that were hiding in my heart about this young man was instantly lifted.  I felt like a ton of bad baggage was gone from my heart. 

I began to question whether or not forgiveness was for me or the other person, because he looked fine. All the while that I was holding onto anger and the memories of the things that I had lost, he had already accepted his responsibility and did his time.  Looking at him he seemed to be at peace. It was then that I knew forgiveness was for me.  I was the one who was losing sleep, losing focus and making it hard for God to forgive me for my own sins. In Matthew 6:14-16 it says “[I]f you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. The meaning of forgiveness is: The act of forgiving; the state of being forgiven; as, the forgiveness of sin or of injuries.  Forgiveness is a choice that we make out of obedience to God.  Forgiveness sets us free from the anger and it allows us to move forward.  Whoever has wronged you, you must forgive that person.  Trust me, it sets you free. Anger and resentment can bind you like a slave and it can also hinder your prayers.

A prayer of forgiveness

Dear God, I choose as an act of my will, regardless of my feelings, to forgive the person who has wronged me. I release them, and I set myself free to Your healing. With Your help, I will no longer dwell on the situation or continue to talk about it. I thank You for forgiving me as I have forgiven them. I thank You for releasing me. I ask this in Jesus’ name, Amen.

Remember forgiveness is for you!!!

God Bless!!